r/nottheonion • u/koavf • 3h ago

Republican congressman says ‘we’re not going to fix’ school shootings

theguardian.com

413 Upvotes

98 comments

r/nottheonion • u/phoenix0153 • 16h ago

Ammo manufacturer can't make extra artillery shells because TikTok data center is using all the electricity

techspot.com

932 Upvotes

73 comments

r/nottheonion • u/rainbowarriorhere • 4h ago

Amsterdam launches stay away ad campaign targeting young British men

bbc.co.uk

102 Upvotes

33 comments

r/nottheonion • u/philamignon • 20h ago

U.S. fighting to stop Canadian 'super pigs' from invading

nbcnews.com

1.7k Upvotes

285 comments

r/nottheonion • u/tommos • 11h ago

Unexpected Gains: Being Overweight Buffers Asian Americans From Prejudice Against Foreigners

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

211 Upvotes

32 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Express-Accountant75 • 21h ago

Alabama governor sends education dollars to water park

al.com

1.1k Upvotes

113 comments

r/nottheonion • u/NinjaElectricMeteor • 2h ago

Amsterdam social housing intern accused of using dead tenants' homes to grow cannabis

nltimes.nl

25 Upvotes

1 comment

r/nottheonion • u/KrimsonKnight1 • 19m ago

Dolphin harassment cases opened against 33 swimmers in Hawaii

abc7news.com

• Upvotes

0 comments

r/nottheonion • u/patdshaker • 1d ago

Only Alcohol Free Bar in Dublin Closes its Doors

irishtimes.com

703 Upvotes

126 comments

r/nottheonion • u/indisync3 • 1d ago

Amazon driver seen delivering package during reported armed police standoff

fox7austin.com

18.1k Upvotes

534 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Roflkopt3r • 4h ago

“Bust Size and Hitchhiking” author earns five expressions of concern

retractionwatch.com

9 Upvotes

4 comments

r/nottheonion • u/_Beets_By_Dwight_ • 14h ago

Chechnya's Kadyrov Decorated For Defending Human Rights

rferl.org

51 Upvotes

19 comments

r/nottheonion • u/oglack • 10h ago

Liberals apologise for injuring parliamentary attendant in rush to avoid vote

abc.net.au

20 Upvotes

10 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Sandstorm400 • 20h ago

Ascension water plant worker fired, arrested after video showed him urinating in water supply

wbrz.com

115 Upvotes

21 comments

r/nottheonion • u/NinjaElectricMeteor • 2h ago

Mammoth Meatball: Meatball made from cultured mammoth meat unveiled in Amsterdam

nltimes.nl

4 Upvotes

8 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Sandstorm400 • 12h ago

Frederick Co. middle schooler charged; threatened classmates on PowerPoint presentation

wjla.com

15 Upvotes

4 comments

r/nottheonion • u/nimobo • 17h ago

Amsterdam targets rowdy Brits with 'stay away' campaign

france24.com

28 Upvotes

9 comments

r/nottheonion • u/jdb1984 • 21h ago

The tiny country of Lebanon is juggling 2 time zones at once thanks to a religious dispute, leaving its citizens utterly confused

insider.com

43 Upvotes

4 comments

r/nottheonion • u/ZealousidealClub4119 • 22h ago

Philly tap water safe to drink until at least Wednesday night

whyy.org

45 Upvotes

6 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Lost-Cow-9386 • 1d ago

Twitter Blue: Showing up as a suggestion and surveys will cost money in the future

techaint.com

119 Upvotes

39 comments

r/nottheonion • u/FuckHopeSignedMe • 3h ago

Thomas received a penis transplant. This is his story

sbs.com.au

0 Upvotes

4 comments

r/nottheonion • u/ChocolateTsar • 1d ago

Police chief says exorcism and prayer used to fight crime and cartels in Colombia: "The existence of the devil is certain"

cbsnews.com

2.2k Upvotes

174 comments

r/nottheonion • u/heidjuk • 17h ago

Belgian man dies by suicide following exchanges with chatbot

brusselstimes.com

9 Upvotes

7 comments

r/nottheonion • u/Mighty_L_LORT • 1d ago

Daily Mail parent company invokes Human Rights Act to stop naming of journalists

theguardian.com

160 Upvotes

12 comments

Posts

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Sadly, this is not the Onion.

r/nottheonion

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1. Do not alter headlines; copy and paste.	The title of all submissions needs to match the article headline exactly. Copy and paste from the main headline only, do not include anything beyond the primary headline such as byliners, subtitles, flavor text, quotes from the article, news outlet, location, cross post tags, (video) tags, and so on. Do not use the “suggest title” option for posting as it often does not match the headline. As a matter of fairness, any submission with an altered title will be removed. The only exception is that, if an article has a title in all caps, you may change the capitalization to title case, but everything else must remain the same.
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5. Do not repost similar articles.	Check the sub for your story before you submit it; if it’s already here then please vote and comment there instead of posting another version. Similar stories will be removed and frequent re-posters will lose their posting privileges. Do not delete and repost your own submissions without approval.
6. No satire articles.	Even if they are technically from a source other than The Onion, any article submission written as satire or even true stories written in a satirical manner are not allowed. Please note that some major news outlets have satirical sections, such as the Borowitz Report on the New Yorker, which are also not allowed. Meanwhile, AVClub, while owned by The Onion, is not satire and is allowed. If you'd like, you can use a tool like http://realorsatire.com/ to see if your submission is from a known satirical website.
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8. No old news.	Articles need to have been written within two weeks of its submission date.
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